Please do not contact me if…

You are an arrogant person. Despite the business angle this is such a personal service that for my well-being I avoid chronically unpleasant people like the bubonic plague. There may be a certain irony in mentioning this as the arrogant rarely recognise it within themselves!

• You have preconceived ideas. New to this or had a disappointing experience in the past? Did the escort grossly misrepresent herself on her website? Unfortunately this does happen with some escorts but it would be wrong to project your negative past experiences onto me. I’m a sensitive, well-mannered, moderately educated woman who – gasp, stagger - genuinely gets a kick out of making people feel good! If you’ve had a jolly time, I reflect positively off that and go home satisfied and rather cheery.

I guess I’m just asking you to leave any clichés and prejudices at the door when communicating with me: giving me a Torquemada grilling is hardly likely to result in a friendly flirtatious meeting! To be fair this is only a minority, but they’re a sufficiently irritating minority to merit a mention. Please take my website and me at face value. Thanks.

• You insist upon a facial picture.
I personally don’t send photographs of my face, even to those that I’ve arranged a date with as it still compromises my security and privacy. As already mentioned I do work part-time in a regular occupation. My reviews are positive and hopefully you’ll get a general idea of my appearance despite my obscured photographs. Well over 50% of escorts do reveal their faces online so it’s illogical to choose a girl who doesn’t, then badger her into sending a picture.

On the upside, it’s worth keeping in mind that if we go out to dinner or hang out for longer there’s never any danger that I’ll be recognised, making that girlfriend experience all the more credible.

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